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Friday, February 18, 2005 |
What If They Put You On An Ice Floe And Nobody Cared?
That's the kind of question Tommy Lasorda has to be asking himself right about now after being promoted to "special advisor" to Frank McCourt. Since neither Frank nor Tommy are around, I'll just have to deconstruct this press release myself...
"Having devoted more than half a century to the Dodgers as a player, scout, coach, manager and executive, Tommy Lasorda represents an incredible resource of information and perspective for this organization," McCourt said.Sure, Lasorda was there for the high points -- the great teams of the late 70's and early 80's, and the unbelievable title year in '88 -- but he also was substantially less than the public image he carefully crafted for himself. He also had a hand in the worst trade in modern Dodger history, and was criminally negligent in his comprehension of contract provisions as a GM. As much as the guy is beloved by a wide spectrum of Dodger fans, it's long past time the club put him out to pasture where he can do even less damage than he could as a vice president.
"His name is synonymous with Dodger baseball and he is recognized around the world as one of the sport's most notable goodwill ambassadors. We will utilize his incomparable talents and keen mind on many varied projects."... such as figuring out what's for lunch.
Lasorda's current responsibilities include scouting... for lasagna ...
evaluating and teaching minor league players"Write this down: 'We gotta play it one day at a time.'"
acting as an advisor and ambassador for the Dodgers' international affiliations"Do I hafta go down to the Dominican again? You know how much I hate guns and diarrhea!"
representing the franchise at more than 100 speaking engagements and appearances before various charities, private groups and military personnel each year.Something he can still handle.
Seriously, this sounds for all the world like the Japanese tradition of putting unfirable executives into a corner office with a nice title, and letting them silently disappear from view. If, paraphrasing DePodesta, the organization needed a kick in the pants, the last thing they'll do is listen to one of the guys who helped them into their decrepit state.
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