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Wednesday, May 04, 2005 |
Bonds Out Even Longer
The Giants continue hoping for the Bondsian miracle return to knock their club -- 14-12, hardly struggling -- over the top and into legitimate contention. And each time, the Magic Barry Eight-Ball comes back: Try Again Later. (Hat tip: Dodger Thoughts.) Perhaps he just hasn't done enough promotion for his new website:
BONDS: ``So what am I supposed to do? Retire?''DR. PHIL: ``You should stop saying everything is going to be fine. You're creating false expectations. Giants fans are psychotic. The team has been winning, but all the fans are thinking about is doom because of all the team's injuries. They believe a 50-game losing streak is right around the corner.''
BONDS: ``So?''
DR. PHIL: ``So they expect you to come back and make everything better. You should tell Giants fans to live in the moment, enjoy what they've got and admire the team's scrappy play. And if you can give them 10 or 12 home runs after you return, whenever that is, that will be a bonus.''
BONDS: ``Did you read that on my Web site? That's not what my Web site says. Dr. Phil, you've been no help at all. You're fired.''
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